Monday, November 06, 2006
i don feel good. witnessing wad i dont want to witness. so i made up my mind to run away from all that is disturbing me. however, i still find myself thinking about it whenever im at home. i wonder why. people behave the way they do, without thinking about others. or sparing a thought for the whole situation. if i were to voice out what i have in mind, will things be better off or will it aggravate the situation? if u were me, will u inflict the pain on others, or just run away and suffer on your own. i guess when im unhappy with those not so close, not so important people around me, i would be very frank and say whats on my mind. but the closer u are to me, i find myself being more cautious, and aware of my own behaviour, because i fear judgement, i fear rejection, and also the fear of spoiling the whole relationship with people close to me. is it good or bad? i dont deny that i complain to others about how unhappy i feel, but ultimately, i still regard those whom i complained about as somebody special and important to me. is this hypocritism? to me it is not. unless the words say are on intention and to cause hurt or harm to that person. because, girls always need to get things off their chest. but who can we trust?
i know this entry is a bit weird. there is math tmr. going off to study alrd.
i wished u could do something more.


shedded at 2:08 AM

MYSELF!
Felicia
Victoria-JC
Seventeen-Plus
Eighteen-October
Feli_cia36@hotmail.com
LOVES!
Volleyball
Fei Fei
Family
Xiao Ming
Years in Cedar
Mahjong Gang
Being Loved
WINNING(money and competitions)
EAT!

HATES!
Liars
Being Unwanted
To Lose
Having Regrets
Nightmares
all the IF ONLYs